Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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