is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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