WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Randomize
