this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Randomize
