if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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