i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Randomize
