I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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