only if we run a train.
done.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
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