Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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