he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
