Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize