question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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