I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
