Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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