oh god the rape fog is back!
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Randomize
