I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Randomize
