I cockslap morals
where am i from again
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
And then he peed in my hair
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
