omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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