I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
We have started to decorate penises.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
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