Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Randomize