i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
im drinking this country out of the recession.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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