she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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