I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Randomize
