this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize