BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
