i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
