I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
