I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
