After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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