Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
