it wasn't lemon gatorade
I think i peed on brittanys purse
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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