I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
