Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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