were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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