your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
