You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
