using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
