I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Randomize
