Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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