I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
