She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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