I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Randomize
