so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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