Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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