im gay
i know
yea but for you.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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