On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
dude. I can hear the air.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
