we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Randomize