just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
