he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Never let your siblings swipe right.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
