Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I need a beard to bite.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
