remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
