we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
